For the past three or so months, I've been reading The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs, a blog purportedly written by narcissistic Apple CEO Steve Jobs. Whoever the man behind the Steve mask is, he's the undisputed master of "in character" fake blogging. Just read this. Or this. Or this. Now word on the street is that Apple made some legal threats, so now the Steve impersonator is shutting down the site. Farewell, Fake Steve. We hardly knew ye.

Mallard Fillmore Watch

Mallard Fillmore: Now with 60% more victimized pre-emptive disclaimers!

Did anyone catch the state of the upn address?

They're going to launch homeboys into outer space

 

OK so what's the deal with the recent trend of celebrities speaking from beyond the grave? Art Buchwald died, which gave the New York Times the chance to unveil their "video obituary" project, featuring final interviews with notable people that will be posted when the interviewee dies, which Buchwald kicks off with "Hi, I'm Art Buchwald and I just died."

Then Orville Redenbacher's Gourmet Popping Corn resurrected Orville, who's been dead since 1995, into a creepy CGI monstrosity to hawk popcorn and awkwardly chat about them newfangled m-p-3 players. But the creepiest thing is the first-person "about Orville" page:

Hello, I'm Orville Redenbacher. You might remember me from the popcorn commercials of the 1970s, 1980s, and early 1990s. Well, it's been about 15 years, but now I'm back selling popcorn in some new and exciting TV commercials.

Yes it's been about 15 years SINCE YOU DIED

All these dead guys are kinda giving me the heebie-jeebies

what up doggie

hey, uh

kinda busy at the moment

im calling you from my new iphone, its pretty neat

the fuck is an iphone?

its the hot new cell phone from apple computer

its got internet connectivity ipod functionality and the screen doubles as george forman grill

hey that does sound kinda neat

gotta go, batteries dyin

8:23:57
8:23:58
8:23:59
8:24:00

rubbercat.net/simpsons has been updated anew with the following changes

• It's slightly better looking now
• Additions to the picture gallery including a rather creepy fan drawing of Marge, Lisa, and Maggie who have all become the same age for some reason
• A primer on forgotten characters from the first season with oh-so-hilarious commentary from yours truly
• Some pretty amazing fanart by internet stud BastardMonk
• Exclusive footage of the first trailer for the upcoming movie!!! Also a dumb counter I got from Google
• A search box in the weblinks that only searches Simpsons sites for those times when you really, really need to know which episode a particular quote came from
• A list of Simpsons-based political epithets that I am hoping will make its way to the punditoctacy and usurp phrases like "South Park Republican"
• Possibly the weirdest damn Simpsons-related news item ever

Everything's coming up Milhouse!