The Non-Sequitur Party

Who We Are Issues and Positions Latest Headlines

Welcome to The Non-Sequitur Party Web Site.

WHO WE ARE

The Non-Sequitur Party is a political party firmly dedicated to the principles of I LIKE PICKLES and salshight. We will destroy the moon and Todd Bridges. Zappa zing zow!

ISSUES AND POSITIONS

National Defense: I am completely flammable!!!

Education: Rabbits

Enviroment: Rob Zombie lives in Luxembourg. At night, the space weasels come.

Foreign Policy: Frosted Flakes are delicous but also deadly so take two of these waffles, beef magnet.

Crime & Violence: Sometimes I question your commitment to Sparkle Motion!

Drug Prohibition: ARROWHEAD COMES STRAIGHT TO YOU FROM PROTECTED NATURAL MOUNTAIN SOURCES IN THE UNITED STATES AND CANADA.

Economy: STEVE URKEL

Freedom Of Speech: Bee Dogs

Gun Control: I still respect and admire Abraham Lincoln even though he is dead.

Health Care: THAT IS THE PRICE OF LOVE

Immigration: i now know that shiny things arent fun to touch

Welfare: A journey of a thousand miles starts with one small step.

Privacy: Fafka fafka fafka fafka FAFKA!

Social Security: He called her Harpo Marx.

Taxes: Vampires are evil but only if they are evil vampires because robot vampires only wish to help humanity and eat pie

Trade: zompf

Women's Rights: Arr mateys

LATEST HEADLINES

PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE FOR 2004 ELECTION STILL NOT FOUND

February 12, 2003 - Non-Sequitur Party officials expressed dismay that a suitable Non-Sequitur Party candidate for the 2004 Presidential Election has not yet been found. Officials, however, are hopeful that a candidate will be decided on before the March primaries. Current contenders include a Nintendo GameCube, a picture of Ed Koch, and Clippit, the Office Assistant from Microsoft Word. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

Questions? Feel free to contact a designated party official here.